When is it time to upgrade?

It's July 3, the evening before our Independence Day, and many are out celebrating or attending the big fireworks celebration downtown. I however will be asleep soon. Stress wears me out.

What am I stressing out about? My stupid car. It's latest issue is a busted radiator. Lucky for me, the parts are less than $100 and the boyfriend can fix it. So it could be much worse. But it wasn't fun seeing the heat gauge max out this morning. It was even less fun trying to drive it home and pulling over three times on the five mile ride home to let it cool off. Not to mention the boyfriend had to come check it out mid-way because I was freaking out thinking my car might explode.

Photo: Carlyle Ellis Photography/Human Quotient

Having the radiator go out isn't unexpected given that my Honda Civic is 19 years old. I mean, how long is a car supposed to last anyway? It does only have 135,000 miles, but as a mechanic friend warned me a few years ago, all of its parts, gaskets, seals, etc. will fail start failing soon.

A lot of things have already broken and already been replace by the boyfriend. He's saved me tons in labor and aggravation over the years (thanks, honey!). So when should I just call it quits?

I came close to doing so last summer. I went car shopping. Narrowed down the make and model to a Toyota Camry or Honda Accord. But I was underwhelmed and if I'm going to spend $15-20k, shouldn't I be a little excited about what I'm buying?

I'm also overwhelmed by the options. SUV or car? If I care about the environment, does that mean I should invest more and get a hybrid or electric?

Another problem is I want the latest safety features for a three-year-old-car price. Not gonna happen. In the meantime, my boyfriend spruced up the Civic, painted the peeling trim and plastic hubcaps, and found a deal on tires.

Suddenly it didn't look so bad.

Plus, there's the cost. I haven't had a car payment in 16 years and pay $280/year for insurance. I definitely like that part.

However, I don't like worrying about how I'm getting my broken down car home or how long it will be out of commission. Or having the boyfriend have to spend time fixing it on his limited time off or in winter. And taking long trips in it feels like a gamble.

He says this isn't a big deal and there's not much else that can go bad since most things have been replaced ... except the clutch.

So should it stay or should it go? I can't decide.

What's the oldest vehicle you've had? How do you decide when it's time for a new one?

Myths of the American Dream: Part I

One idea that is continually spoken as fact is that home ownership is always a sound investment. Renters are perceived as throwing their money away, while home owners are building equity!

Home ownership is the expected thing, the thing many aspire too. It's what you're supposed to do.

Often, I'm not sure if home ownership is all it's cracked up to be. Never was, but I bought this little house anyway. I wouldn't say I regret it, exactly, but I think you really have to make sure you know what you're getting into before you buy. Heck, before you go to an open house and fall in love with a property even.

About that throwing away money on rent...let's just look at the numbers shall we?

First, if I take the full 30 years to pay off my mortgage, I'll end up paying more than double the purchase price, and that's WITH a heavy 20% down payment. It would take more than two years of my entire current salary to pay the interest alone.

My mortgage may equal what I paid in rent before I bought this house (which is only because I bought a tiny house), but consider that I'm paying double that with interest and then add an extra 40% for property taxes.

I haven't even gotten to maintenance yet. If you own a home then eventually something is going to break or need replaced. And sooner or later than something is going to be expensive.

The day I signed the purchase papers and got the keys to my house I came over and found a leaking faucet, a roof leak in the kitchen  and a leak in the furnace room. none of these things were there a few days prior. Luckily, with some help from my stepdad, none of them were very expensive, but still you get my point. In the seven years I've owned min hus I've paid for chimney repairs (twice), replaced the AC/furnace, repaired the roof, replaced the hot water heater, bought two dehumidifiers for the basement, and spent hundreds of dollars on paint, painting supplies, tools, sandpaper, and miscellaneous repair expenses. If I hadn't had lots of kind help in making those repairs (thanks boyfriend!!, stepdad!) it would have cost three times as much. And I'm sure there are others I'm forgetting.

Have I mentioned the lawn and garden equipment I never had to own as a renter? Or all the projects that still
need to be done?

Call me a pessimist, but with the drop in home values I don't see how I'm going to get all that back if I sell anytime soon....and probably not when I sell it no matter how long away that may be.

Why is paying rent "throwing money away," but paying interest, taxes and maintenance aren't?

Don't get me wrong, if you want to own your home for other reasons then great. If you want something to call your own, decorate as you like it, by all means. Maybe you enjoy DIY and maintenance, and in that case, boy will you love owning a home! Buy an old one for extra fun. Just don't buy a home because you think it's an investment or something adults do.

Green Hypocrisy

After today's trip to the grocery store I'm left wondering if I am just a big, giant hypocrite? The short answer is yes, of course I am. Most of us are hypocrites to some extent. Religious zealots who preach love and kindness, yet kill in the name of religion or treat homosexuals like murderers. Wannabe greenies like myself who claim to care for the environment yet drive and use central air con. You get the idea.

I thought I was on-board with small, green changes at least, but now now I'm not so sure. When we walked into Kroger for our quick weekly shopping trip, I was dismayed that half the lights were out. It was also almost as warm inside the store as it was outside. Great, I thought, they must be running on a generator. I jumped to this conclusion because following a freak storm a week ago Friday, more than one million Ohioans were without power and our neighborhood was hit pretty hard. Some still lack the magic juice. But everyone seemed to be shopping normally, and I wanted food, dammit. So onward we went. 

I was a bit apprehensive about the perishable foods, like dairy items. The coolers seemed to be running normally, however, and I was pretty sure they wouldn't be if the store was on generator power. But that's when we noticed another strange event; the shelves were mighty bare. There was a giant hole on the shelf where the Chobani yogurt usually sat. The boy wanted Gatorade, but there was nary a bottle to be found. Same thing with our usual brand of lunch meat, my beloved feta cheese, and hummus. The fruit that was on the shelf was past its prime. I began to wonder if the stock crew was on strike.

By this point we were in produce and I was getting irritated. I asked an employee what the deal was, and he said the store was trying to conserve power because of the recent outages. He had no idea why they were out of so much stock, however.

Now, there was at least one day last week where our local electric provider, AEP, asked customers to conserve energy to prevent rolling blackouts as they brought more storm victims back online while some equipment was still out. If we didn't conserve, they warned, they would have to shut off some customers to keep the equipment from being overwhelmed. So I thought maybe there had been another call for conservation, but I hadn't heard a thing about it despite being online most of the day. After searching the issue online when I got home, I found absolutely no mention from our power company of further immediate needs to conserve power. So was this really a move to conserve energy, or was it a move to cut the company's costs?

Some of Kroger's conservation methods seemed better than others. Unplugging the extra displays of cold items that were set up in secondary locations to promote sales made perfect sense. These were no big loss since you could still find the items in their primary location.

At this point the boyfriend asked if I wanted to abandon cart and head to another Kroger, but I hate grocery shopping and we'd already invested time in that store. So I voted for pressing on.

By the time we checked out I was grumpy enough to think about shopping at a competitor in the future if the conservation program was going to stay in effect. Maybe it was the bare shelves that pushed me over the edge, but I didn't enjoy shopping in a hot, dark store either. Which made me wonder, am I being unreasonably grumpy about a change in the status quo? Is it really that big of a deal to be a little warm for our 45 minute weekly shop if it saves energy? And what about the employees who had to work all day in a warmer than normal store? Our cashier had a red face and looked even more grumpy than I felt.

We left with less than half of our normal groceries and I was in a bit of a huff, with a head full of questions. What do you think, do we need to start giving up some of our comforts today so we don't lose all of them in the future? In other words, am I being a giant baby who just needs to suck it up, or are there other ways my local Kroger could implement to conserve energy? I'm really interested in your thoughts.

How Long Could You Go Without Buying Superfluous Stuff?

image: Ed Yourdan

It seems like more off us are swearing off superfluous buying these days. I decided to buy no new winter clothes, which turned into not buying anything besides food and essential products (like soap) yet in 2012. It's Not Easy Being Green declared March a no-buying month (food and other essentials only), Meg at MakeItDo (interesting tumblr by the way, definitely worth checking out) challenged herself to go all year without any non-critical purchases and NotBuyingAnything tries to buy as little as possible all the time. All of which makes me wonder, exactly how long could I continue this not-buying challenge?

Not buying unneeded stuff for 2.5 months this year has been surprisingly easy. As long as I stay away from my temptation stores, I've been fine. I've even gone in stores and managed to leave empty-handed. I did pick up a few items during  thrift store visit once, but upon further examination I realized I didn't need them and didn't even like them that much so I left empty-handed. But I don't think I could keep this up all year. For one thing my hot weather wardrobe is seriously lacking. I doubt that I have five work-appropriate outfits, so that would be an issue. Other than that there might be a thing or two I want (bike gloves for instance), but I could live without them.

My reduced shopping habit has also paid off in the personal finance department. Upon doing a little research, I saw that even though January and February tend to be low-spend months for me, due to the excess of the holidays no doubt, I ended up having my lowest total spending month on record in February. That translates into at least an extra $100 or so that went straight to savings. Imagining the impact of 12 or more months of that kind of increased savings is a pretty powerful motivator.

It's really quite amazing to think that a couple of years ago the boyfriend and I spent at least one weekend day a month shopping, well window-shopping mostly, for something. Now that seems like a waste of a perfectly good workfree day.

Are you taking any not-buying challenges this year? How long could you go?


Related good reads: 

• Why I am SO Not Buying an iPad 3 by Mr. Money Mustache
  

• Do You Love This Thing by Deliberatism - This post is along a similar vein, one of examining the stuff in our lives, although it doesn't specifically address the shopping portion of that equation. Still this blog is a new and very interesting find that I wanted to share.

Why Don't We Teach Girls to be Handy?

lynxhoney

Let's face it, owning a home can be stressful. But owning a home when you're not the slightest bit handy? Well that can be a nightmare.

Luckily, I have a handy boyfriend. He's completed more repairs and projects around this place than I can ever remember. Just this week he replaced the garbage disposal and fixed a water leak in the toilet. If not for him these repairs would have taken longer to get fixed, been way more of a pain for me to deal with, and cost much more.

Before I met the Boy, any little issue with the home would send me into a tailspin. Instead of seeing a dripping faucet, I saw my money dripping away. My first thought when anything broke was great, how much is this going to cost me? My second thought was to freak out. I'm also lucky to have a handy stepdad who has made many 1.5 hour drives to help with my house crises, but with two houses to maintain already and a full-time job, I feel guilty whenever I need his help. I'm much more calm now that I know the Boy can handle most things, and does so without complaint.

I'm an independent woman in every other area of my life, and was taught to be so. But when it comes to fixing or improving my home and car, I have to depend on others. And I hate it. I'm lucky to have people who are dependable, trustworthy and willing to help in my life, but I've often had to put my trust in strangers, many of whom let me down.

We rarely expect women to do things like fix their own leaky faucets, change their oil or remodel their kitchen. Sure there are women who buck this stereotype and you can find them all over the internet, but in my real life, I don't know any. All the women I know depend on their husbands, boyfriends and fathers for help. I think we're doing a real disservice to women when we don't teach them, or teach ourselves, how to handle some of these tasks on their own. Afterall, we expect men to know how to cook, do laundry and clean these days, so shouldn't we also expect women be able to handle tasks that were traditionally done by men?

wwworks

Of course I'm not blameless in this situation. Today we have more tools than ever at our fingertips to help us learn these skills on our own, but I haven't taken advantage of them. Nor do I stick around when the Boy is repairing things to try and learn from him. I prefer not to have to deal with these things, but I can't have it both ways. I think its high time I learn how to do more DIY repairs.

What about you, do you think we should teach girls and women how to basic repair and DIY skills?

Light or Dark?

I got a new end table as a gift from my mom. I love it, the size, the fact that it's round. The only thing I need is another one, but it was an auction find that she painted so finding a match may take some time.

But this new addition does cause a dilemma. Every piece of "wood" furniture in my living room is a different color, ranging from brown/black all the way to white. So what should I keep, and what should go?


I prefer the light, clean feeling of the white. But I can't imagine the coffee table in white and I wonder if painting everything white will be a bit much in combination with the fireplace. The boyfriend prefers the dark black/brown color of the coffee table, which I think might be too dark.

Lately I've been thinking about leaving the coffee table alone and painting everything else white. What to do, what to do? What say you Internets?

Decluttering Slump

This adequately illustrates the current state of my decluttering efforts

Much like my recent blogging efforts, my decluttering efforts have seriously dwindled to, um, nothing though it might not look like it since I was decluttered way more than an item a day a few weeks ago. Part of this is due to time and focusing on other things right now, and part is due to pain levels since most, but not all of the easy stuff is already gone. Note that I didn't say it's because my house is decluttered, because although there's been some improvement, it decidedly is not.

I've been trying to figure out why it's so hard for me to let go of certain items of clutter. I'm not even talking about items that have sentimental value. So what am I talking about?

1. Wooden dish drying rack - I haven't used this in at least three years, not since I fixed my dishwasher, and yet, because there is space for it in my cabinet and I "might need it sometime," I can't manage to discard it.
   
   
2. Gameboy - I haven't played my original gameboy in years and years. But it still works and hey, it might be worth a lot someday to some videogame nut. Regardless, I just can't let it go.
   
   
3. The rest of my fat clothes - I've lost several sizes in the last year, but somehow I can't quite part with all my fat clothes yet. Because what if I gain the weight back? I have managed to part with the clothes that are now three sizes too big, the ones I never wore, and the ones that needed repair or were stained. That still leaves way too many though.
   
   
4. Plastic plates - For all of those dinners outside I never have. I don't even think I've used the darn things.
   
   
5. Books I want to get rid of, after I read them one more time - You know, just in case they suddenly became uncrappy in the last several years. Olivia Jules, I'm looking at you.
   
   
6. Last year's IKEA catalog - I used to keep every IKEA catalog I ever received, which wasn't that many really. I've purged a couple, but still have more than one, which is silly.
   
   
7. Those ugly dark green towels - I bought these for college, which was, I'm not telling you how many years ago. I keep hanging on to these because they are so useful: gym towels, rags, etc. Guess how many times I've used them? Yep, none.
   
   
8. (to be continued)
   

This is just a sample of course, there is much more stupid crap I'm still hanging on to. So how does one overcome this?

• Try, try again. Things change and one thing that works for me is persistence and regular decluttering efforts. I've been going through some of the same boxes of mementos for years and I've found that what seemed incredibly important a few years ago, I might be willing to let go over the next time.
  
  
• Limit yourself. Set a limit for how many things you don't use but still want to keep that you're willing to hold on to.
  
  
• Check for substitutes. Check and see if your local library has a copy of a book you don't love but might want to keep, or maybe a neighbor or friend will let you borrow that tool you have but hardly ever use.
  
  
• Write about it. Seriously looking at the list above is making it sink in just how silly some of these things are. While the Gameboy is safe, Olivia is on her way out.
  

Obviously, I'm still struggling with this myself, so what tips do you have for me?

Garden Mysteries: Can You Name These Blooms?

From time to time a plant pops up in the garden that either I forgot the name of, or never knew in the first place. Sometimes these mystery plants are weeds, sometimes they're not. But still, I'd prefer to have some idea of everything growing in my garden. Which is where I'm hoping you come in, Internet. I have quite the collection of the pretty blooms above, but have no idea what they are.

After further research and going through my seed packets, I think these are Sweet William. What threw me off is that I didn't plant Sweet William this year and the green spiky head of the flower is not what I expected Sweet William to look like. Mystery solved at least.

There is magenta and light pink varieties so far.

And then there are two of these tall spindly plants with white blooms. They're not so pretty and I'm hoping they're not weeds. Any and all clues to the identity of thesep lants are most appreciated!

Friend or Foe?

Can someone help me out and tell me if this is a weed? The foliage looks like a weed to my untrained eye, but the flower is so pretty. I can't think what I could have planted that might look like this though. Almost every unexpected plant that pops up around these parts usually turns out to be a weed.

Garden Mysteries: What the Frick Is This?

The picture does not do it justice; this is one wicked looking plant that is growing out form under my box hedge. Check out the bloom in the top left. But is it a friend or foe?

Actually it's one FAST-growing wicked looking plant. I swear it wasn't there yesterday when I was weeding. It seems like everything in the garden is loving this cool, wet weather.

I can't wait to see what the flower looks like.

The Great Sofa Dilemma

Picking out my first sofa shouldn't take as long as picking out my first house, but it's looking like it might. Those closest to me know that I'm terribly, painfully slow at making big decisions, especially those involving large amounts of MY MONEY. It's taken me months to find a serious contender for my new sofa. I've been to every major furniture store (and most of the smaller ones) at LEAST twice. My boyfriend is threatening to start charging my mother for all the time he's had to spend sofa shopping because "she made me this way" (his words mom, his words). Who knew it would be so difficult, almost impossible really, to find a comfortable tan sofa with clean lines, covered in a durable fabric, that doesn't cost an arm and a leg? But finally, finally, I have two finalists.


The second runner up is Macy's Corona. The lines aren't quite my idea of perfection, but they're darn close. It's quite comfortable, surprisingly so considering how streamlined it is. The only downfall, and the reason why it's my second runner up and not already on order, is the fabric. The "acrylic, polyester, nylon blend" feels a bit bit scratchy, but worse yet I'm sure our three cats will scratch and snag the heck out of it. This is the kind of fabric that would irresistibly satisfying to sink your claws in, even I can see that. And while it comes in three fab colors, it isn't available in any other fabrics. So *sniff" it's no Corona for me.


The first place contender is Macy's Kensington. It's new, our friendly salesperson told us, and isn't listed on the Web site. It's made by Bauhaus, but I can't find it on any Bauhaus site either, or anywhere on the Web period. Hence my crappy pic with even crappier Macy's mood lighting. The Kensington is comfty, although a little too cushiony for me and comes in a wide range of microfibers. The one fabric pictured above is actually a small, tasteful herringbone (unlike the hideous herringbone couch my boyfriend loved at another store - gag), not a solid tan, which is what I'm leaning towards. So the Kensington seems to be the best combination of comfort, style, durability and price that I've seen, but it's still not quite perfect. :( I'd love to find a review from someone who has this sofa!

My second big decision is whether to get a loveseat too, a Kensington chair, or entirely different chairs. I grew up in a couch-n-loveseat household, and I inherited couch and loveseat sets, so I'm kind of nervous about bucking tradition, but the chair is really comfortable. Better than the couch really.


Decisions, decisions. Did I mention the Macy's saleslady said they get totally new sofa designs in every few weeks? Maybe I should just wait. The perfect couch might be just a few weeks away! Just kidding, honey, just kidding.